{"id":20606,"date":"2016-12-30T14:33:55","date_gmt":"2016-12-30T20:33:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.blissfulbasil.com\/?p=20606"},"modified":"2021-04-27T12:18:28","modified_gmt":"2021-04-27T18:18:28","slug":"things-im-afraid-tell","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.blissfulbasil.com\/things-im-afraid-tell\/","title":{"rendered":"Things I'm Afraid to Tell You"},"content":{"rendered":"

Yesterday\u00a0started off like any other day. I woke up, hopped in the shower, and tossed on a podcast while getting ready. Usually one to hem and haw over what to listen to, yesterday I impulsively\u00a0hit\u00a0\"play\" on the\u00a0episode at the tippy top of my unplayed feed:\u00a0TLS #186: Things I'm Afraid to Tell You<\/a>\u00a0by Jess Lively.<\/p>\n

The episode is an updated extension to a\u00a0blog post<\/a>\u00a0Jess wrote\u00a0nearly five years ago. One in which she courageously outlined the things she'd been\u00a0afraid to share online for\u00a0fear of rejection, judgement, etc.<\/p>\n

\"Things<\/a><\/p>\n

I\u00a0won't spoil the episode by detailing\u00a0Jess' personal list, but I'll say this: it was perfectly timed wisdom and one of those serendipitous\u00a0perspective-shifting moments.<\/p>\n

You know the type?\u00a0Moments when, within the boundaries of ordinary circumstances, we fatefully collide with the answers we hadn't yet\u00a0realized\u00a0we were seeking. When one of the\u00a0questions, doubts, or fears embedded within our internal narrative rises to the surface and is greeted by a resolution. This\u00a0was absolutely one of those moments.<\/p>\n

Realization<\/h6>\n

When I started blogging, my\u00a0only goal was to scratch\u00a0a curious summer itch. I thought, \"Hey, this\u00a0might be a fun way to keep myself entertained this summer<\/em>,\" and began writing my first post\u00a0a few minutes later. Very few people read what I shared those first handful of months. So few, in fact, that\u00a0the first time the blog broke 100\u00a0pageviews in a day, I thought one of my posts had surely gone viral. Now there are times when I click on\u00a0'Real Time' stats in Google Analytics and\u00a0realize there are over 100 people actively perusing\u00a0the site in just that one given moment in time.\u00a0Things have certainly changed.<\/p>\n

The sea of beautiful eyes on this space has expanded\u00a0beyond my wildest dreams, opening up possibilities, opportunities, and adventures that have shaped my life in the most wonderful way. It's been both inspiring and humbling at the same time. And my goodness, receiving a heartfelt email from someone who has\u00a0been touched by the blog in some way makes my heart feel as if it just might\u00a0explode with gratitude. So much gratitude.<\/p>\n

But the more eyes there are, the more pressure I've put on myself to tiptoe, tread lightly, and color well within the lines. Not because you've asked me to but because my fears have. In the past, I frequently wrote blog posts that veered into psychological topics and uncertain life territory. In recent years, I frequently veer but rarely hit 'publish'. Why? Because I'm afraid.<\/p>\n

Afraid of being judged for\u00a0my\u00a0vulnerabilities or angering people who meandered here through the interwebs for the recipes only. As I listened to Jess' podcast yesterday, I realized that I've been so<\/em> afraid, in fact, that I've even been afraid to tell you I'm afraid. How crazy is that?<\/p>\n

So much fear, so little time.<\/p>\n

But then it dawned on me. What's on\u00a0the other side of fear? FREEDOM. We always have a choice. We can observe\u00a0fear from a safe distance, allowing it\u00a0to become the\u00a0self-imposed limitation that fastens\u00a0us to\u00a0where we are. Or we can take a deep breath, run forward with as much valor as we can muster, and bravely climb\u00a0the fear fence that stands in our\u00a0way, using it as a tool to propel us closer to\u00a0where we want to be.<\/p>\n

Only time will tell how I'll feel on the other side of clicking 'publish' on this post, but for now\u00a0I'm armed with running shoes and wings.<\/p>\n

\"Things<\/a><\/p>\n

Resolution: Telling You the Things I've Been Afraid to Tell You...<\/h6>\n

But first, I want to clarify that my intention in sharing isn't to solicit\u00a0your understanding but to solicit my own. To look fear square in the eyes, give it a high-five and a fist-bump, and release it right here in front of you.<\/p>\n

Here goes nothing<\/del> something...<\/p>\n

\u00bb\u00bb\u00bb Lately, I've had this\u00a0broad, looming sense of uncertainty and confusion about how to best move forward with the blog and my career in the new year. There are so many things I want to share and ideas I want to tackle that I often don't know where to begin. Most of all, I've been struggling to pinpoint a single path that encompasses my love for cooking, fuels my curiosity for holistic wellness, and<\/em> plays on my strengths as a psychologist. For months, my plan was to create a separate platform to\u00a0house all wellness- and psychology-related materials, but I'm worried\u00a0that maintaining two separate internet spaces will leave me spread thin. On the other hand, I'm worried that if I\u00a0infuse Blissful Basil with too much psychobabble you'll all go running. Still an unsolved mystery but it feels less scary now that I've called it out.<\/p>\n

\u00bb\u00bb\u00bb I've developed pretty thick\u00a0skin over the years, but just the other week\u00a0a snappy\u00a0blog comment written by\u00a0a total stranger made\u00a0me cry. Not the first time, probably won't be the last.<\/p>\n

\u00bb\u00bb\u00bb Comparison truly is the thief of joy, and sometimes I go a day or two\u00a0without checking my\u00a0social media accounts in an effort to avoid comparison and nip feelings of jealousy\u00a0in the bud. On occasion, I end up feeling guilty for taking that time away.<\/p>\n

\u00bb\u00bb\u00bb I'm my own harshest critic and despite preaching\u00a0the importance of self-compassion to others, I often need reminders to be gentle with myself.<\/p>\n

\u00bb\u00bb\u00bb Sometimes I have no idea what in the heck to write for blog posts, and I worry I'll bore you all to tears. You'll know I was having one of those days when you stumble across a post with exemplary brevity!\u00a0Here's a smoothie! It's refreshing, tart, and colorful. Enjoy!<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00bb\u00bb\u00bb I often talk myself out of new ventures and projects that I'm passionate about for fear that I'll be labeled\u00a0a fraud or someone will question, \"Who does she think she is?!<\/em>\" Imposter Syndrome<\/a>, anyone?<\/p>\n

\u00bb\u00bb\u00bb I'm fascinated by\u00a0the cosmos,\u00a0spiritual exploration, energy fields and auras, and intuition. I'm constantly curious about these things but rarely share my thoughts for fear of being perceived as \"out there\" or\u00a0woo woo<\/em>.<\/p>\n

\u00bb\u00bb\u00bb The song \"Auld Lang Syne\" (i.e., the NYE song) stirs up dark\u00a0memories of SAD<\/a> winters passed. Even\u00a0though I've been effectively managing the good ol'\u00a0winter blues for years now, I still wince\u00a0at the sound of it.<\/p>\n

\u00bb\u00bb\u00bb My biggest fear is disappointing people.<\/p>\n

\u00bb\u00bb\u00bb Despite being a well-documented phenomenon\u00a0that affects the vast majority of bloggers, the seasonal dip in traffic known as the \"Summer Slump<\/a>\" still messes with my head.<\/p>\n

\u00bb\u00bb\u00bb After 10+ years of being on the pill (the one with a notoriously terrible reputation), I stopped taking it earlier\u00a0this fall and have been battling\u00a0weird but surprisingly common withdrawal side effects like hair loss,\u00a0dry skin, and bloating. Of all the side effects, the\u00a0worst has been a decreased appetite, because it makes brainstorming new recipes and recipe testing particularly difficult. It's hard\u00a0to come up with creative ideas when nothing sounds appetizing! Thankfully, I stumbled across this blog post<\/a>\u00a0from The Holy Kale about two months ago. It\u00a0outlines a slew of tips and tricks to naturally combat\u00a0BCP withdrawal (a whole foods plant-based diet is one of them).\u00a0I've also been taking a maca supplement, a broccoli-based detox supplement that efficiently escorts xenoestrogens out of\u00a0the body, and a natural hair and nail support supplement. If anyone has faced similar side effects\u00a0from BCP withdrawal, please feel free to reach out.\u00a0I'm an open book with this stuff and happy to share what's worked and what hasn't. I'll tell you one thing, this maca supplement<\/a> has been a game changer for energy and cycle regulation (no affiliation with the brand whatsoever, simply based on my personal experience).<\/p>\n

WHEW.\u00a0Think that's it. Fears released. I feel\u00a0lighter and surprisingly more peaceful. Just one thing left to do now:\u00a0scoot the\u00a0mouse across the screen and click 'publish'. Ready, set...<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Yesterday\u00a0started off like any other day. I woke up, hopped in the shower, and tossed on a podcast while getting ready. Usually one to hem and haw over what to listen to, yesterday I impulsively\u00a0hit\u00a0\"play\" on the\u00a0episode at the tippy top of my unplayed feed:\u00a0TLS #186: Things I'm Afraid to Tell You\u00a0by Jess Lively. The...<\/p>\n

Read More<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":20777,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wprm-recipe-roundup-name":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-description":"","_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true},"categories":[13,2534],"yoast_head":"\nThings I'm Afraid to Tell You - Blissful Basil<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Things I'm Afraid to Tell You | What's on the other side of fear? 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